So Nimm Denn Meine Hande...

Monday, May 01, 2006

The ultimate band...

Now those that know me know that I'm a musician, and I love talking about rock and metal bands. I'm also a huge fan of Guitar Techniques, a guitar magazine from the U.K. A while ago there was a 'debate' among the readers of "who would be in the best band of all time". People picked their "dream" guitarists, drummers, bass players, keyboard players and singers...and then went off on why their choice was the only logical one. I had my own entry, but as of today I'd like to officially change it. Here's my new entry for World's Ultimate Band:

1. Lead Guitar = Al Mohler

2. Rhythm Guitar and lead vocals = CJ Mahaney

3. Bass = Mark Dever

4. Drums = Ligon Duncan

Now I know that none of these guys are serious musicians (or more likely cannot play to save their lives and are tone deaf), but can you imagine how awesome the lyrics would be? Imagine how awesome it would be if there was music like Aryeon/Sonata Arctica/POD/Megadeth/Nightwish/Lullacry/Children of Bodom/etc. with lyrics like this:

http://www.monergism.com/thethreshold/articles/onsite/together.html

Effin' rights. I'd spend my life savings buying their CD's. I'd become a roadie and work for free. I'd possibly even consider a TATOO. Where are the good metal/rock bands with lyrics that are good, both morally and theologically? Where's the modern version of Psycho Surgery/Pathogenic Occular Dissnance era Tourniquet? Why is so much Christian music completely bed-wettingly wussy and theologically sleeping with Bill Hybles/Ron Luce/Joyce Meyer/John Eldridge/whoever else is 'nice' but stupid? It's time that Calvinists got a pair and learned to shred. Until Next Time,

The Armchair Theologian

4 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well - I can't vouch for the other guys - but Mark Dev actually has mad skills in singing bass parts with quite a voice and he can play the piano -

2:58 PM

 
Blogger The Armchair Theologian said...

Really? WORD!

12:32 AM

 
Blogger Andrew L said...

The choice of musicians is alright, but the choice of intruments lacks creativity. Try something like this:

1. Clarinet = Al Mohler

2. Accordian and lead vocals = CJ Mahaney

3. Bagpipes = Mark Dever

4. Steel Drums = Ligon Duncan

I mean, if the strength of the group lies in great lyrics rather than great sound, why not try something a little different?

11:48 AM

 
Blogger The Armchair Theologian said...

Well, if we're going nuts, how about this:

1. Trylon = Al Mohler

2. Windform = CJ Mahaney

3. Bonang = Mark Dever

4. Fire Organ = Ligon Duncan

These are some of the craziest instruments I could think of. Look them up on google or something. You'll most likely pee your pants. A Band using THESE instruments would be definitely bizarre...indeed. I just have a mental picture of the ensemble on stage and I cannot control my laughter! HA! Oh SNAP!vzt

12:44 AM

 

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