So Nimm Denn Meine Hande...

Thursday, November 16, 2006

Some days I don't got it at all...

...But other days I'm ON FIRE! I was reading the blog of my best friends sister and hubbie and noticed something common. She had posted something regarding the 'gears' she gets when people ask her what she does and she has to kinda defend herself for being "JUST a mom". Well, I don't like that one bit. No sir. SO, I concocted a clever response that she can toss at people when they give her the gears again...not that she ever would. She's far too sweet and well mannered. Either way, it's wicked awesome in my head, and I'd love to hear someone say this JUST ONCE. Behold the following ficticious conversation:

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Hmmm...Thinking of creative responses that you shouldn't say, but would want to...(HA HA!)

Snotty Career Gal: "I'm currently working at (whatever) where as my husband, Sven, works at (whatever). It's nice to have the dual incomes; makes payments on the Mercedes easier and we can still afford to take (son or daughter) away from prep school for several weeks in the Mauritius every summer. It's fantastic! So, what do YOU do?"

Sass-mouth Mom: "Well, I run a small business that has recently won a large, long term contract with what is currently an expanding multi-tiered, multi faceted new corporation in the local area. Currently, I'm doing research, design and project implementation for the first phase of the contract, working with a focus on "synergistic work and recreational space revitalization" for our base clientele, with side projects revolving around research in the fields of relational and conflict management, communication theory, office and recreational administration, nutrition, stress management and relaxation theory and generally holistic client health and wellness, with a dualistic project focus of both training and practical implementation. Soon, the company will be moving onto the second phase of the business operation and will be adding several other clients to our contractual base while concurrently expanding our portfolio to incorporate pharmaceutical, medical, culinary, educational, financial, janitorial, artistic and entertainment fields. Finally, the business plan will reach it's projected third stage, moving toward an end goal of having a core ensemble built around a corporate tri-fold vision of mental, physical and spiritual development which would in turn expand the business strategy to meet and ultimately surpass the long term operational success projections, culminating in biotic self replication of both core value and strategy and the establishment of new corporate centers in various cities in this, and possibly several other cities and countries."

Snotty Career Gal: “Holy Smokes! That sounds unbelievable! You must be one BUSY woman, what with running a huge business like that and everything! Wow!

Sass-mouth Mom: “Yeah! It’s not easy being a mom!”

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Oh man! I don't know where some of my craziness comes from, but it's mostly good when it does! HA! I hope y'all enjoy the fruits of my sleep deprived brain! Until Next Time,

The Armchair Theologian!

6 Comments:

Blogger 4given said...

HILARIOUS!!! thanks for making me laugh so hard!

5:50 AM

 
Blogger Jon said...

Stay at home moms get my upmost respect. That way the children get shaped and molded the way the parents want and not the way their babysitter or daycare agency wants. This is the best way of raising a child but the rising costs of living and so forth makes it harder to do this nowadays.

12:53 PM

 
Blogger Craver VII said...

Dude, you get a standing ovation for saying something like this at a homeschool convention. I heartily agree!

1:16 PM

 
Blogger Jennifer said...

Sweet. Mercy.

I was torn between two responses - the first being that "ugly laugh" (the one where it's about as unlady-like as one can get, all wheezy and stuff), second being getting chill-bumps because that was pretty much the raddest thing I've read all day.

Major propage, man.

That was awesome...I'm so memorizing that for future reference.

11:24 AM

 
Blogger The Armchair Theologian said...

Fer Sure. What Jon and Craver said. And Jen? If you memorize that and quote that somewhere, one day when you're a mom, I don't know what I'll do, but I'll definitely do something awesome for you.

Or make you some crazy gift and mail it to you, like a shirt with that quote on it. HA!

Speaking of shirts, doesn't Carla have a $10 gift certificate for me from when I won your photo caption contest Lisa? (Notice THAT Jen? HA!)

1:57 PM

 
Blogger The Armchair Theologian said...

No wait...it was a hilarious camp story contest! The bed wetting story! HA!

1:58 PM

 

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